


if the shoe fits

by miramiro



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Getting to Know Each Other, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Moon Taeil is Whipped, Romantic Fluff, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Suh Youngho | Johnny is Whipped
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:15:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28053762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miramiro/pseuds/miramiro
Summary: Taeil is somehow both Cinderella and the Fairy Godmother, as well as the Prince in Johnny's life.
Relationships: Minor Lee Taeyong/Nakamoto Yuta - Relationship, Moon Taeil/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Comments: 6
Kudos: 87





	if the shoe fits

The raucous chatter and chanting were getting to Johnny even as he downed shot after shot of soju, ignoring the burn in his throat and the burn high up in his nose, a threatening sign of imminent tears. He didn't want to be here—at this bar with his batchmates and seniors from his prestigious University, drowning his sorrows in alcohol, getting drunker by the second—he didn't want to be in South Korea, period.

He missed home; Chicago. He missed his parents and his friends. Even the boyfriend who broke up with him two days before Johnny left for Seoul because he didn't think they could handle a long-distance relationship. At eighteen, Johnny understood that their relationship wouldn't have lasted even if Johnny had stayed in Chicago, but he was heartbroken and petty enough to wish his ex-boyfriend would regret his decision for all eternity; that he would feel all his life what Johnny was feeling right now—sad and lonely.

Fueled by his senior's encouragement and the misery bubbling in his heart, Johnny downed another shot, and promptly buried his face in his arms, the dizziness blotting out the cheers around him. He was about to cry, he just knew it. He wasn't an easy crier, but he'd been holding all his emotions in and keeping himself together for the past two weeks. 

A warm pressure on his shoulder made him lift up his head to see his senior looking at him with concern.

"Are you alright?" his senior asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just dizzy," Johnny croaked out, mustering what he hoped was a reassuring smile. It seemed to work because his senior just patted his shoulder and turned to his friends. Or maybe his senior just wanted to chill with his friends instead of bothering with a junior who seemingly couldn't handle his soju. 

Johnny slammed his head down into his arms again, letting the vitriol coat his emotions. He wanted to be home, he wanted to let his father's words and his mother's embrace comfort him. He wanted his own bed instead of the hard, uncomfortable, unfamiliar bed waiting for him at his dorm. Before he knew it, the emotional exhaustion and excessive alcohol took their toll on Johnny and he dozed off.

Just as he was dreaming about his ex-boyfriend—reliving the pain all over again—a melodious voice singing a heartrending song reached his ears, breaking his fitful sleep. Johnny lifted his head up, too dizzy to open his eyes, but too spellbound to  _ not _ listen to the song. A hush had fallen over the bar, letting Johnny concentrate on the smooth male voice singing about a lover who left him. 

Johnny’s nose twitched, eyes welling up with tears. The beautiful voice, singing so emotionally about heartbreak hit Johnny right in his heart. It felt as if the singer was giving voice to Johnny’s feelings; he made the pain sound beautiful, an experience to be had. Then the bridge of the song took on a hopeful note, the lyrics talking about learning from the hurt. The tears rolled down Johnny’s cheeks freely as the song came to a close, the singer singing about healing and moving on, his final high note reverberating throughout the bar, before fading away gently. A second later, the bar erupted in cheers.

Johnny dashed out of the bar and inhaled and exhaled deeply, letting the cool late-night breeze and the low thrum of traffic envelop him. It felt good to be out, breathing in the pollution-tinged fresh air with the song still playing on a loop in his mind. It felt as if the song crashed on the sand of his sorrow like a tsunami, washing everything away. It felt cathartic.

His feet carried him forward and he ended up walking all the way to his dorm, humming the song to himself, determined to make the best of his situation. That night, despite the uncomfortable bed, for the first time in weeks, Johnny had a deep, dreamless, peaceful sleep.

  
  


*

  
  


The next time Johnny heard that lovely singing voice, he was drunk again. On happiness. And soju, of course. He was celebrating the end of his first semester exams at a noraebang with his friends, Yuta and Taeyong, and a few of their seniors. The mood was buoyant and Johnny was especially jubilant because he  _ knew _ he aced his papers—proving that while late nights cramming at the library and all-nighters in the dorm were unhealthy, they did pay off—and because he was flying home to Chicago the next day.

Johnny had already sung two solos, and one drunken group song (that was more chanting than singing) with Yuta and Taeyong, and was now gleefully watching them warble through a drunken duet. Yuta and Taeyong were lost in their own world, swaying from side to side with an arm wrapped around the other’s waist. Johnny made sure to record their performance on his phone. For blackmail purposes, and possibly for playing at their wedding years later—Johnny had recently begun to suspect that something was brewing between the two—but mainly for the blackmail. 

Watching Yuta rest his head on Taeyong’s shoulder at the end of their song while everyone cheered for them, and seeing Taeyong drop a swift kiss on the crown of Yuta’s head before pressing his cheek against it, made Johnny feel a pang of phantom pain. Yes, he had gotten over his ex-boyfriend. No, he hadn’t found anyone else, too busy adjusting to life in Seoul. No, he wasn’t sad. Yes, he had to admit he was a  _ little _ lonely. 

Johnny had hooked up with a few people during the semester but hadn’t felt like going through the motions of dating someone with the intention of getting into a relationship with them. And it wasn’t like he needed it; Johnny was happy with his life. But now, looking at Yuta and Taeyong, watching them gravitate towards one another like it was the easiest, most obvious thing in the world to do, noting the fondness in their eyes when they spoke to or about the other—Johnny  _ yearned _ . He yearned for that feeling of belonging again; Johnny had a big heart and a lot of love to spare.

He sighed as Yuta and Taeyong slumped in their seats again. He noticed their entwined hands and smiled triumphantly. He snapped a photograph again, and then downed another shot of soju, pretending to be busy  _ not  _ clicking photographs that would later come in handy as evidence for when Yuta and Taeyong would eventually deny their feelings for each other. The only downside of this was, that one shot of soju was one too many, and Johnny suddenly became aware of the pressure in his bladder. 

“Hey, I need to pee,” he informed his friends and manoeuvred himself out of the cramped space without waiting for a reply. 

Slipping out the door, Johnny nearly stumbled in his hurry to get to the washroom. Steadying himself against a wall, Johnny took a few breaths to calm down, waiting for the wave of dizziness to pass so he could walk to the washroom carefully without the risk of bodily injury.

Using the wall for support, Johnny slowly walked along the hallway, smiling to himself as he passed the noise in various rooms. He was happy to assume everyone at the noraebang was feeling as relaxed as he was. 

The beautiful highs and lows of a brilliant vocal run make Johnny stop in his tracks. It was the same singer from back at the bar. Johnny was drunk then, and Johnny was drunk now, but the voice had haunted him, rattling around in his skull from time to time; there was no way Johnny could forget that voice. He inched closer to the slightly ajar door—it was faulty and didn’t shut properly; he knew because he was in this room a couple weeks ago—and rested his head against the wall as he listened to the singer belt out a cheery pop song, putting his own dramatic spin to it.

Uncannily, the lyrics once again seemed to echo Johnny’s feelings: the singer sang about wanting a love that’s all his own, that would make his heart flutter. Johnny was impossibly charmed. Having heard the power that voice could carry and the pain it could convey, Johnny sighed blissfully, letting the dreamy voice lend colour to his feelings.

As the song came to an end, Johnny felt a burning desire to meet the singer, to thank him for being at the right place at the right time, for helping Johnny deal with his emotions. He realized, almost belatedly, that the burning in his gut was his full bladder protesting. He had no choice but to hurry to the washroom.

Once done with his business, he stepped out of the washroom, feeling relieved along with experiencing a floaty sort of lightness that he blamed partly on the alcohol in his bloodstream, and partly on the singer’s voice that had carved out a space for itself in Johnny’s mind, heart, and soul. He rushed to the room, intent on meeting the singer, but found it open and empty.

Letting out a sigh, Johnny made his way to his room, where his seniors were singing a girl-group song and his friends were waiting for him. As he took a seat, he tuned out the tone-deaf singing. His thoughts revolved around the mysterious singer who surely was a fellow student at the University since he was at the bar which his seniors had booked for the First Semester party. Determined, Johnny vowed to find the singer after the holidays.

  
  


*

  
  


Johnny didn't find the singer, but he found Moon Taeil. He found that Moon Taeil had been assigned to be his partner by his professor for his elective class, and they needed to work on a project together that would be worth 30% of their grade. 

Over the days spent at the library and the campus cafe they frequented, Johnny also found that while Taeil was a few months older and a (good) few inches shorter, he was also easy-going, easy to work with, and very,  _ very _ easy on the eyes. Taeil smiled easily at Johnny’s jokes and puns, and equally easily made Johnny burst out laughing simply by being unabashedly, unapologetically himself. 

A couple meetings after their first one, Taeil had asked Johnny whether he could call him Youngho, and Johnny had been surprised—not even his parents called him “Youngho” and they were the ones who had named him!—but he had agreed immediately. He liked how his name sounded when Taeil said it, voice curling sweetly around the vowels.

By the time their project came to a close (and they scored the highest!), Johnny was hopelessly endeared. He had been afraid that Taeil might not hang out with him as much now that they were done with the project, but Taeil made sure to sit beside him during every lecture, and even took the initiative to plan their outings.

Johnny finally,  _ truly _ explored Seoul, and with Taeil by his side—colouring every place they visited in warm shades of nostalgia with snippets of his childhood memories—it was like nothing Johnny could have imagined. Suddenly, Seoul, Taeil’s home, by extension, became Johnny’s home too. He was so glad his parents had decided to send him to Seoul to  _ “get in touch with his roots” _ ; how else would he have met the magical, mesmerizing Moon Taeil?

Being doted on at home and meeting his friends had felt so good, so great after the months of sadness and loneliness, Johnny almost hadn’t wanted to return to Seoul. But thoughts of the mystery singer had spurred him on. Plus there was the increased tension between Taeyong and Yuta—they clearly missed each other, but instead of messaging each other privately, they sent cryptic messages (that they deleted immediately) to their group chat that they had very creatively named ‘95z’. Johnny would have been tired of it, had he not been busy taking screenshots.

Now, while Taeyong and Yuta continued their will-they-won’t-they routine, Johnny bombarded their chat with “ _ Taeil said—”, “guess what Taeil did—”, “Taeil is so cute!” _ , Taeil, Taeil,  _ Taeil _ . He always got angry emojis from Yuta and a “ _ Just ask him out, already!” _ from Taeyong, and one day, having truly had enough of them, he replied to Yuta’s emojis with:  _ “me @ you two pining for each other like idiots” _ , and to Taeyong’s message with:  _ “me @ you two because JUST DATE EACH OTHER ALREADY!!!” _

There was silence on the group chat all day (making Johnny wonder whether he had royally fucked up) until Taeyong messaged, stating:  _ “We took your advice.”  _ Yuta simply sent a photo of him and Taeyong looking post-sex dishevelled, hickeys littered on their skin. Johnny sent a  _ “TMI, dudes!” _ and added a,  _ “but i’m happy for you two! :)”  _ and sighed at the  _ “Bitch, you did this! ;)” _ he got from Yuta.

To celebrate (and to thank Johnny for his help), Taeyong and Yuta took him to a crowded bar with the promise of free drinks and good food. Well, Johnny got that, and much more, including a Taeyong and Yuta constantly attached to each other by the lips. Johnny wanted that with Taeil, he suddenly realized in an alcohol-induced haze.

Yuta and Taeyong excused themselves—blowjobs in the bathroom, Johnny guessed—just as Johnny was beginning to feel morose. He missed Taeil even though they had hung out just a day before, having gone to catch a film after their last lecture of the day. He pulled out his phone to text Taeil and squinted at the screen, trying to remember his password.

Even in his drunken state, Johnny’s ears perked up as the music blaring from the speakers died down, and someone took to the mic to announce that they were going to have live music for the next hour. There was drunken cheering which Johnny ignored, still trying to get his password right. 

The  _ familiar _ voice sultrily launching into a love song, made Johnny loosen his grip on his phone enough to make it slip out of his hands and fall to the ground. Swearing under his breath, Johnny ducked down to grab his phone, his vision too blurry and hands too unsteady that it took him a good 30 seconds to locate his phone. His ears filtered in the song, and  _ only _ the song, the singer crooning about the stirrings of love leading to a nervous confession and a kiss of reciprocation.

So engrossed was Johnny in the song, eyes closed, letting his imagination paint a vivid picture of a first date with Taeil, that he accidentally bumped his head into the table as he straightened up, phone in hand. By the time he was done massaging the throbbing pain away, the song came to an end, and Yuta and Taeyong appeared, hand in hand. 

Johnny didn’t remember how the rest of the night passed, but he woke up determined to confess to Taeil, no matter the consequences. Grabbing his phone to call Taeil, he was pleasantly surprised to see a message from him asking Johnny whether he’d like to check out a new cafe with Taeil that was open only on Sundays. Johnny texted back,  _ “you don’t even need to ask! i’m in!”  _ and jumped out of bed, ready to hit the showers.

The three successive pings of his phone made him stop in his tracks and rush to read the messages. Uncharacteristically, it was Taeil, and not the 95z chat like Johnny thought it was.  _ “It’s a date, then,”  _ Taeil had texted, followed by,  _ “If you’d like it to be, that is,”  _ and a,  _ “I’d like it to be…” _ immediately after it. Johnny’s heart skipped a beat before starting to pound in his ears.  _ “YES!” _ he messaged Taeil.  _ “yes, yes, yes!”  _

It felt as if Taeil had read his mind; Johnny chalked it up to the luck of the mysterious singer who had once again unknowingly drawn-out Johnny’s feelings through his song. He couldn’t help but marvel at the coincidence, wishing he’d be able to thank the singer in person someday. But for now, he was content with mentally hoping the singer would have as great a day, wherever he may be; like Johnny was about to have with Taeil. 

  
  


*

All the places Johnny had been to in Seoul, yet his favourite was the space between Taeil’s legs, where Johnny could spend hours sucking gently on the inside of his boyfriend’s thighs—if only Taeil would let him. He'd told Taeil as much as he wrote the sentiment in the form of a lyric of the song he was composing for his music composition class. Taeil had been scandalized, blushing prettily as he playfully throttled Johnny for embarrassing him, but their tussling soon turned heated and Johnny found himself where he wanted to be.

The contrast between Taeil’s velvety soft skin and his chapped lips always drove Johnny mad, especially when Johnny held Taeil close, skin on skin, exchanging kisses. He couldn’t help but marvel at how he wanted to both reverently worship every inch of Taeil’s body and violently love it, leaving bruises blooming on his smooth skin. And he did—adorning Taeil’s skin with splotches of pinks and purples, before riding him roughly until Taeil came, brokenly moaning Johnny’s name. Taeil returned the favour by pushing at Johnny’s chest to make him fall back onto the bed and wrapping his plush lips around Johnny’s dick, and swallowing everything, before bonelessly falling into Johnny’s welcoming arms.

They basked in the afterglow in silence, their breaths evening out. Johnny let the sound of his heartbeat syncing with Taeil’s and the warmth of his boyfriend’s body lull him to sleep. But Taeil broke his reverie as he raised himself up to whisper, "Youngho…" before wetting his lips and kissing Johnny softly. Johnny felt his ears burn as he returned the kiss; somehow a post-orgasm Taeil loving him gently always made him feel shy.

But that was last night and right now, 23 hours later, Johnny found himself at his favourite bar, drowning his post-breakup sorrow in alcohol. He wondered if he was on the path of turning into an alcoholic, and asked the bartender for more tequila.

He hadn't told anyone yet, about having broken up with Taeil; it hadn't sunk in yet, and Johnny was afraid of feeling like it was really, truly real. Over the nearly-four months they had been in a relationship, Johnny and Taeil rarely had a disagreement, let alone a fight. They just. Got along. And if they ever had an argument, it never took more than a day to mutually resolve it. 

For the first time, they had been arguing on and off for a week about Johnny wanting Taeil to come to Chicago with him to meet his parents during Chuseok. Taeil felt it was too soon, which made Johnny’s insecurities from his past relationship flare-up. Johnny thought they’d come to an understanding the previous night after they had made love, but the matter had reared its ugly head in the morning. 

It started as a blame-game with both of them stripping each other’s insecurities bare, and ended with them hurting over the other having broken their trust and opened up a world of pain for them. Johnny’s spiteful, “Maybe we should break-up,” was met with a tired, “I think so, too,” from Taeil, and Johnny had walked out. 

That was three hours ago. Johnny didn’t feel drunk despite the amount of alcohol he had consumed; he just felt sad. He wanted to go back to Taeil and apologize, hopefully, cry in his arms, and fall asleep snuggled against him. He wanted Taeil.

He pulled out his phone, ready to text Taeil, but found himself struggling with the password again. He vowed to change it to something like Taeil’s birthday as soon as he managed to unlock his phone—right now, he just wanted Taeil. An errant thought popped up in his mind about the singer, where he might be, and whether he would show up miraculously to give voice to Johnny’s feelings. Johnny had forgotten about trying to find him because he’d been so wrapped up in Taeil and their relationship.

Suddenly, his phone started vibrating in his hand: it was Taeil calling. Shakily accepting the call, Johnny mumbled a questioning hello.

“Youngho,” Taeil’s warm voice, sounding urgent and tinged with worry, brought tears to Johnny’s eyes. “Thank God you picked up! Youngho, where are you? I went mad texting and calling you, calling our friends—nobody knows where you are, and—” Taeil’s voice cut off, as Johnny whimpered, his eyes welling up with tears and lips trembling.

“Youngho? Please talk to me,” Taeil urged. “Please. Where are you?”

“I—” Johnny hiccuped. “I’m sorry, I don’t want to break-up,” he added, as sobs wracked his body and he cried freely.

“Me neither, darling,” Taeil pleaded. “But please tell me where you are? I’ll take you home. Please, Youngho?”

“I’m sorry,” Johnny insisted.

“I’m sorry too, Youngho. Please let me come get you?”

Johnny mumbled the name of the bar and listened to the sounds of Taeil hurrying out of the house and hailing a cab, all while he stayed on the phone with Johnny, comforting him. Johnny didn’t know how long it took Taeil to reach the bar, just knew that nothing felt safer than his boyfriend’s embrace. 

“We aren’t breaking up?” Johnny asked fearfully in the cab, tucked against Taeil’s side. Taeil fondly brushed Johnny’s hair out of his eyes, cradling his cheek, and whispered, “No.”

Later, in bed, Johnny fell asleep with his face buried in the crook of Taeil’s neck with Taeil’s arms wrapped around him. In the morning, he woke up before Taeil and immediately went and amended the lyrics of the song he was writing—his favourite place to be in was Taeil’s arms, close to his heart. Smiling to himself, he got back into bed and snuggled against his snoozing boyfriend.

  
  


*

On the eve of his birthday, Johnny found himself at a noraebang with Taeil and their closest friends. Johnny only had eyes for Taeil, though. And ears; arms, and legs; heart and soul.  _ Johnny _ in his entirety was for Taeil. 

Johnny was not drinking that night, content to have his phone out to snap pictures and record incriminating videos of their friends making a fool of themselves. He wanted to be absolutely sober for the birthday sex he was eagerly looking forward to having—he’d been dying to try out a new vibrating plug, and he’d finally get to do it.

Sneaking a look at his friends—Yuta and Taeyong, already drunk, were warbling through a duet together once again while their other friends cheered them on—Johnny turned to Taeil, and captured his lips in a kiss that started rough, but slowed down almost immediately into something softer and sweeter. It wiped out all the dirty thoughts in Johnny’s mind, warming him up from the inside. He  _ loved _ Taeil, and Taeil  _ loved _ him.

“It’s midnight!” Yuta screamed suddenly and Taeil pulled back from the kiss, and got up, smiling fondly as he danced away and out of the grasp of Johnny’s grabby hands. Taeil went over to Yuta and Taeyong who handed him a mic with knowing smiles on their faces. The cheers were even louder as Taeil faced everyone, but trained his gaze on Johnny. 

Johnny’s thoughts whirred at breakneck speed. Taeil was about to speak? Sing? Johnny frowned as he realized he’d never heard Taeil sing—they hadn’t ever gone to a noraebang for their dates, either.

“Youngho,” Taeil smiled into the mic, and the word spread throughout Johnny’s consciousness, calming him down immediately. “This is  _ one _ of my gifts to you. I hope you like it.” Johnny blew him kisses at him which made Taeil’s cheek pinken, the spotlight bathing him giving him an otherworldly glow.

Taeil began to sing, and Johnny’s brain short-circuited and stopped functioning, resulting in his jaw-dropping and hanging open while Taeil sang about a love that was fated, written in the stars, meant to be; only a few lucky ones could find it, and he—he had found it with Johnny. Taeil closed his eyes, letting his voice convey the depth of his feelings. 

Johnny didn’t even realize his eyes had welled up with tears until they spilled, falling like rain to the ground, and yet, Johnny remained in a trance. Taeil’s voice—the heavenly voice that had unknowingly given him so much strength, that Johnny had been trying to find, not knowing it was right beside him all this while—tore Johnny’s heart to shreds and mended it back again. 

The echoes of Taeil’s last high note reverberated as he took a breath to steady himself. “Happy birthday, Youngho,” Taeil murmured into the mic. “Thank you for letting me be a part of your life, thank you for existing. I love you.”

Taeil had barely finished speaking when Johnny was out of his seat and in Taeil’s arms, face buried in Taeil’s shoulder, the remnants of his tears blotting the soft fabric. There was raucous cheering and everyone started singing Happy Birthday for Johnny, but he could only focus on Taeil.

“It was you,” he mumbled. Taeil’s hands stilled their soothing caresses over Johnny’s back for a second, before starting again.

“Me?” Taeil questioned, genuinely clueless about what Johnny was talking about.

Johnny broke out of the embrace, Taeil’s hands immediately cupping his face to wipe the tear tracks away. “I’ll explain at home,” Johnny stated, smiling softly at his boyfriend. “I love you, too. I just—” he cut himself off by pressing his lips to Taeil’s. It felt like their lives had been leading up to this very moment.

Written in the stars, indeed. Johnny and Taeil were  _ meant to be _ .

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, hi. I've only had johnil as a side couple in my kunten fics so far, so it was high time they got to shine on their own. 
> 
> Do let me know what you think!
> 
> My [twt](https://mobile.twitter.com/gummieistrying); my [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/gummieistrying). Come talk to me!


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